Posts Tagged men
Man Made- is a great book by the Journalist Joel Stein. The book chronicles his quest to learn about masculinity by interviewing and interacting with men in traditionally manly jobs. The jobs and journeys include- Fireman, the Army, UFC Fighters, Hunting, and baseball. The quest was inspired the birth of Joel’s son Laszlo. Joel felt that he needed to learn more about being masculine so he could he help raise his son right.
Joel said, “My dad gave me the very manliest gift: feeling safe. Because once you feel safe, you can take risks. I want to make Laszlo feel that way. And now I think I might be capable of doing that. Just like my dad did.” –Joel Stein
One of the connections I made with the above quote is my friend Paul growing up. Paul did not have a lot of confidence in high school. However once Paul got a girlfriend his confidence soared. The girlfriend like Joel’s dad made him feel safe and secure in the world. Now when I would go to parties with Paul even when is girlfriend was not around Paul was always very loyal to his girlfriend but no that he had a girlfriend he felt that he could get any girl and that party. I noticed this newfound confidence that I attributed to Paul having a secure safe attachment with his girlfriend.
One of the other highlights from the book was Joel’s interaction with ex football star Warren Sapp. Warren said that when he was younger he was quite the philanderer.
Warren Sapp stated,” At nearly forty a man should not be attracted to twenty year olds, he can’t relate to. You want someone that loves you. That’s what you learn in the long haul. He says that grass on the other side is artificial turf. Do not lay down on it because it’s going to hurt like hell.”
I highly recommend the book is a quick fun and entertaining read. Here is a picture of the Author Joel Stein with his son Laszlo below.
I was having a lunch with some friends and this topic came up. Is it ok for a woman to pursue a man. My first response is that it goes against evolution for a woman to pursue a man. Men are the hunters right? Well my are no longer out in the fields and many are working now in office jobs where woman make equal and sometimes even more then men. So the times are much different. So upon further reflection I think its fine for women to approach men and initiate contact. The part that becomes problematic is when a women pursues a man and he is “just not that in to her” but she does pick up on the clues. The reason that she does not get the clues is that women do not have much practice in this area. As a male one learns to deal with a lot of rejection from women and brushes it off as not big deal. Women do not have as much experience esling